Sick and tired.
its depressing That i only had one post last year. And it’s even more depressing that i’m only here when i have something to whine about, or when i’m upset, or when i’m too sad, or when i feel like i want to take a thousand-year break from life, or when i feel like i don’t want to exist anymore. Just like now. Gawd. All these do not make any sense at all. But somehow, hitting the keyboard and typing all these gibberish is the only thing i can do to keep meself from breaking apart. I have to end this senseless emoish whimpers. I need to stop this shit.’Posted: August 12, 2012 in Uncategorized
and that too.
Complaining about the weather may seem a little crazy thing to do since people do not have control over it, but dang, it’s just so fucking hot here!
I’m not whining, really. I just wish I live someplace else where there’s snow.
This is my first entry for 2011. And it’s April. Last week of April. Pffft. Sorry bloggie, I really am a bad blog-parent.
I’ll get back to you…
They’re out of tune – they have attitude problems – they don’t play instruments anymore – they’re out of tune – they obviously do not know what they’re singing (wrong words/lyrics) – and, err, did i mention they’re out of tune? Yes, their tunes are shooting in different directions all throughout the song!
I honestly don’t wanna blog tonight because there’s really nothing to blog about. I just put up something in my other blog moments ago, and it would be redundant if I blather about the same stuff here. It’s just that, I feel, well, a little obligated to put up something here (or it’s just my bloggerly instinct, I guess). Actually, a friend asked me what my purpose is for keeping two blogs. I don’t want to explain that over as I already did that in my previous posts, so I simply told him this is where my rants go. He then started nagging for a blog update on this site. Dang, how nice of him to ask for an update when he doesn’t dang write comments!!! Does he fucking know how I feel??? It’s like I’m talking to myself, just like now, for chrisake!
It’s technically 4 days minus some hrs before Christmas and here I am feeling like a loser for not being able to attend a single Christmas party – thus, not being able to enjoy good food and drinks, not to mention not getting gifts. Pfft.
The only gift (I consider it a gift) that made me jump in joy this year was a package of art supplies which I got last October from a good friend in Seattle, WA. I don’t have enough cash to buy gifts for my family and friends this Christmas, and they’re perfectly aware of that, so I definitely won’t complain if I don’t get any this year. That’s the only fair thing, I guess.
Ok…that’s it for now. Byerts!
Sure, Christmas is around the corner. The cool air, especially at night, is a sign. A lot are actually complaining about it – that they’re having difficulty getting out of bed in the morning because of the cool weather. Well, that’s their problem not mine, as I wake up at almost noon everyday. Yep, breakfast and lunch in one. Saves me some dough.
I feel that nobody wants to talk to me anymore. Or, maybe it’s just me. Pffft. My emotional and psychological blahness are getting a bit shaky again. Gawd, wish I know a shrink who I can talk to at no charge. Right now, my self-worth and self-esteem are plumetting real low. I don’t feel myself worthy of anything. In my head I hear the fucking “I’m a loser” repeating itself over and over again! This isn’t good, I know.
I shouldn’t be doing this, but it can’t be helped. When I get in a funk like this, it takes me so much time to get out of it.
Hope I get better after this.
I can’t help but lose a piece of self-confidence each day. There’s not much more to say now except that I am really feeling down.
Well, I’m NOT giving up. It’s really all I can do.